Monday, June 27, 2022
A condolence card I received from Joe Accetta read, "All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." It's a quote by Helen Keller. How very true, and a sentiment that I repeated numerous times to Jim in his last few days. We revisited our three cross country car trips and a 1999 retirement celebration road trip from Connecticut, to Niagara Falls, to Key West. We did like to travel. He always wanted to go to Montana, but that is one of the few states we missed. Got as close as Wyoming and South Dakota!
Jim loved the game of golf thanks to my older brother Bill who was a teaching pro over in Denton, MD. I think Jim might be the one responsible for getting Pop into the game. Jim took great pride in the fact that he played on Torrey Pines in San Diego with my brother; he played in Breckenridge, CO with our son-in-law, he played on the Greater Hartford Open course when we lived in Connecticut, he played numerous Delaware courses, he played some special course in DC with his older cousin, and he played Pinehurst No 2 when we lived in Pinehurst, NC. We decided Pebble Beach was too expensive, but he jokingly took pride in the fact that he peed there. :)
Family was paramount to Jim and we tried to continue the annual vacation routine his parents had established. We enjoyed beach week in Delaware as well as several beaches in North Carolina. We even flew to Denver, packed Julie, Rob, Joshua, Jay, Jim & I into a van and visited Mount Rushmore with the helpful support of the "kids."
Back in 2005, when I approached Jim with the idea that it was still possible for me to fulfill a young girl's dream to become a flight attendant he said, "Go for it! I will give you all the moral support that I can." Am guessing neither one of us thought I would make it. :) But, at the age of 60, I did start flying for Southwest Airlines. And he actually shed tears of pride and joy for me! He managed the Homefront by himself for the initial month of training and for weeks at a time while I was flying around this big U.S.A. He was the chauffer to the airport. The house was neat and clean enough when I would come home that we could have invited company for dinner! When I found a neon green frog floating in one of the toilets, I thought it was a gag. Turned out Jim used bleach to clean the toilets and some little wayward frog had sadly found his way into our pipes.
I don't necessarily buy into the idea of "soulmates", but I sure do believe that Jim and I were good for each other. Like most people, we had challenges thrown at us over our almost 56 years of marriage but managed to support each other when we needed to and survived those instances when we might have missed the other's need. Jim gave me a treasured gift of his Calhoun family. I can still feel tiny Mazie's bear hug today. And when Irving died, I told Jim that Pop was the only person who never asked or expected anything of me, he just loved me. Jim actually gave me the beautiful gifts of Julie and Jay. I had given up and was full of fear after we lost our first born baby...but he refused to give in to the fear. He was smart.
"All that we love deeply becomes a part of us". Helen Keller
I will love you forever, Jim.
